Early Morning Workouts Don't Take Up Quality Time, or Do They?

I started working out in the early morning hours when I began running again after my kids were born. Six in the morning was a time without excuses. My husband wouldn't be late getting home from work, I wouldn't be starving for dinner, and I wouldn't have any conflicts with other family activities. More importantly, I wouldn't have guilt because my whole family would be sound asleep as I sneaked out of the house. They wouldn't even know I was gone except for the way I would smell in the morning when they woke up to give those good morning hugs.

It's been nine years now since I started those early morning runs, and those runs have grown to include many early morning bike rides as well as swims. I still find that I enjoy my workouts more in the morning because I can do them free from feeling like I'm supposed to be somewhere else. It feels like time that doesn't really count. However, sometimes I do find myself wondering if I'm fooling myself.

Although my family may not realize that I've been gone in the morning, they do notice that I got up early when I tuck them in at night. You see, I start out by walking into my children's' rooms with intentions of having a nice bedside conversation. All the parenting books say that this is the time your kids are most likely to open up to you and share their thoughts. I sit on the edge of the nice, cozy bed and decide that it would be a real bonding time if I just lied down and had some snuggle time with my daughter. After all, how often do we get to do that anymore? Before I can even start the evening prayers she is telling me about her day, and I'm fighting to keep my lids from slamming shut. Then within seconds drool is spilling out onto her pillow and I am uttering comments to her chatter that make absolutely no sense! The only thing that saves me is that the kids think these comments are hysterically funny.

My early workouts have also affected my relationship with my husband. Our movie dates now consist, with few exceptions, of me putting my head on his lap about a quarter of the way into the movie and falling sound asleep. He has stopped getting mad at me for this and has come to accept it as part of our relationship. I can't even seem to stay awake in the movie theater any more. This problem can be embarrassing depending who I'm sitting next to, and can cause a lot of neck discomfort for my morning swim the next day.

I keep saying that I'm going to get to bed earlier. My goal is nine o'clock, but that is almost laughable. I don't usually have the dinner dishes finished by then. The kids would have to put me to bed. (I guess that is what they do anyway, except that I wake up to finish the dishes.) The real problem is that my husband doesn't usually get up by six, so night time is his most productive time and the time he likes to spend with me (awake), so I try to stay awake to get the most quality time with him. After my little "nap" with the kids I can often muster up enough energy so that we can have a nice evening together, usually retiring around eleven.

I often wonder if I was able to get more sleep, would I be less grouchy at night? Would those bedtime conversations give me more insight into my kids' days? Would my quality time with my husband be even better? Maybe, but how would I get my workouts in without the guilt? This is the conundrum of the mother triathlete.